I remember the first time I found Mac Miller. The year was 2010, I was entering my senior year of high school. I was obsessed with all things Pittsburgh (nothing has changed). I was equally obsessed with finding undiscovered music, artists, songs - perhaps for bragging rights, or because the radio played the same five songs on loop (again, not much has changed). I discovered a mixtape titled KIDS. The artist was Mac Miller, a random white rapper who was only one year older than me. The Spins quickly became MY song and Mac Miller quickly became MY favorite. KIDS began to get buzz as the year went on, and Knock Knock gave my friends a reason to enjoy Mac too. Senior Skip Day was the obvious anthem, and soon we knew every word to every song. It was only shortly after that Mac Miller did his first tour, and conveniently stopped at the Chance Theater, a short drive from home. Working two hours at Justice provided all the funds needed for my $15 ticket, and low and behold I was able to attend my first Mac concert on May 2nd, 2011. It was a Monday. Mac had also released a second and third mixtape titled Best Day Ever, which quickly became a big part of my life, and still is today, as well as On and On and Beyond. Rapping along to Donald Trump flawlessly was a must, Best Day Ever made for every Facebook status ever, my morning alarm switched daily between Wake Up and Get Up, and Another Night was the song to blast when you’d had a rough day at school. I had so much fun at my first Mac Miller concert. I knew this was a person I would love forever, and I was not wrong. The mixtapes continued to pour out, song after song putting a smile on your face. I continued to see Mac live, feeling equally as excited as the last time. After all, he did touch my hand twice. The energy Mac Miller brought at a show was quite special, and quite personal. I left every show feeling like a proud friend, and feeling like I had a connection to this boy my age who made music that put me in a favorable and carefree headspace. He started to become my music to lean on, the only person I cared to listen to regardless if I was happy, sad, or anywhere in between. My visits to Pittsburgh began to double in meaning, not only going to see the Steelers, but going to visit the very spots that Mac made famous in his music including Blue Slide Park and Frick Park Market. 2011 was the year of Mac, and Blue Slide Park began to give him even more of a name than his prior mixtapes. Following BSP, two of my favorite Mac collections ever were released - Macadelic and Watching Movies with the Sound Off. It became seemingly clear that Mac Miller was no longer the feel-good happy rap guy. The music became slower, filled with less life and heavier topics. I was 19-years-old and thought nothing of it. I loved it endlessly and could be found in my freshman door blasting Macadelic start to finish daily. It was such a mood. Watching Movies was a pregame anthem, and an incredibly fun concert to be at. Filled with energy, and maybe some anger. What I loved most about Mac Miller was that every collection of songs released was so different than the last. No two albums/mixtapes/EPs had the same sound. Each unique, telling a different story about Mac’s life, mindset, and surroundings. Mac finished his career with three studio albums in four years, all special in their own way. GO:OD AM gave us good mood upbeat rap, with lyrics that reminded you just how smart this person was. The Divine Feminine gave us poetry. A sultry love sound. I often listen to this album when laying down, and feel most at peace. Floating. Seeing Mac three times in 2016, this album began to feel like home, and made me appreciate it more and more each time.
I begin to choke up as I realize Swimming, his most formidable, remarkable, awing, inspiring, album yet, will be his last. To go out on such a high note seems almost unfair, the future being so bright and holding so much. I could sit here and dissect every song on the album, why it makes me happy, how much impact each poetic line has had on me in such a short period of time. Come Back to Earth gave a glimpse of insight to the struggles Mac Miller appeared to be facing in his final months, but in turn appeared to have a silver lining. The moment I heard this piece, there was not a single doubt in my mind that this album would be my favorite to date. It’s lullaby-like melody was so calming, yet gave me so much to think about. Self Care, the first single off the album, felt like a two-for-one special with an upbeat switch mid-song. The music video was an ode to the album as a whole, and to see Mac break free from a coffin seems hauntingly appropriate today. The Swimming finale sends a chill down my spine. So It Goes shares a sound that feels like the ending credits of a movie. It was the final song shared on Mac Miller’s Instagram story prior to his passing. My heart is heavy, and will remain so for a long time. Mac Miller - thank you for shaping my youth musically, I’ve truly never felt the way about an artist the way I do about you. Favorites have come and go, but I will never connect to someone the way I’ve done so with you. I feel like I lost a friend, it’s a shocking pain that feels almost impossible to cope with. November 23rd, 2018 would have been my tenth time seeing you live, a milestone I was so excited to hit. Never did I think I would sit here only two months prior writing an ode, a goodbye. I am broken, but thankful for ten years of music to lean on. Love always, your biggest fan
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